A son walks up to his father and saws, Dad where did we get our names?
The father replies, well when your sister was born i looked across the
field and i saw a running deer so i called her running deer... When
your brother was born i looked up in the sky and saw a flying eagle so
i called him flying eagle...do you understand now son?
Son:yes but...
Father: Oh stop asking me all these questions Three Puking Dogs
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
A blonde, a brunette,and a red head walk into a chuch.They go up to
the priest and say we would like to join. The priest replies,First you
must sin and then you will be clensed with the holy water.
The next day the brunette comes in crying, the priest says what did
you do she says i killed a dog. He says, good go and drink from the
holy water.As she drinks she says mmmm this holy water is good.
The next day the red head comes in crying, the priest say what did you
do, she says i killed a dog.The priest says good now go and drink from
the holy water.As she drinks she say mmmm this holy water is good.
The day after the blonde comes in laughing.The priest say what did you
do and why are you laughing. The blonde replies, I peed in the holy water.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
Three friends die in a car accident, and upon their arrival to
heaven, they are all asked one question.
"When you are in your casket and family and friends are mourning upon
you, what would you like to hear them say about you?"
The first man says, "I would like to hear them say that I was a great
doctor of my time, and a great family man."
The second man says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful
husband and school teacher who made a huge difference in our children
of tomorrow."
The last man replies,"I would like to hear them say: 'LOOK! HE'S
MOVING!'"
